How Do We Go Back From This?

In between our loud screams and name calling, I suddenly wonder where all the love has gone? We used to listen to each other speak and now we can’t wait to talk over one another. I said I needed space, you didn’t even try to fight me.

You said we need to keep our options open. I have nothing to choose from, what did you mean by that?

It’s been a hard few days, who am I without you? Do I miss you? Do you think about me? Am I pretending that this will pass or do I feel like this is the end?

My heart is broken. I feel nothing. Is it because you made me strong enough to take on anything by myself or if I am yet to realize that this isn’t going to work.

I think about you. About us. Every day.

I can feel you hold me close, I can hear you whisper promises about taking on the world together.

I miss your face, I miss your voice. I miss everything about you.

But mostly, I miss everything about us.

Loving you has been worth it. But somewhere, someplace we got lost. And I can’t seem to find us.

I’ve been saving us, from as long as I remember. And I think that’s where I let go of who we could become.

The longer I tied knots on broken threads, the more damaged we became.

And I sit here wondering, how do we fix this? How do we go back from all of this?

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